This past Tuesday night at our regular WOW (Women of Worth) meeting at church, we had a speaker talk about perseverance. Hang on, hang tight, dont let go, and trust God always no matter what the circumstance. The Pastor even spoke on Sunday about "Im Still Here". We may have went through the valley, gone through muddy waters, lost everything, people talk about us, some dont like us, or whatever, WE ARE STILL HERE!. I think God is speaking to me this week and I am going through something that is going to be tough.
In past blogs I have written, I have spoken about my past relationships about being abused, cheated on, and how my life has went to shambles. Either I did it to myself, or my spouse did it to me. Im not saying it was all their fault, it was both. My last marriage really did it. I had alot of trust issues but did not have them until after I was divorced. I didnt know he cheated on me until after then. So, it took alot for me to be able to trust again. I am in a relationship now to where he does nothing against me to be able for me to have those insecurities, trust issues or anything against him. I am having to let go of those issues and Im telling you, its really hard. We have been dating for almost 2 years now and he has yet done anything wrong towards me. So, why is it so hard for me to let go? I have wanted to speak at our WOW meeting and the topic was going to be "Let Go and Let God". I was getting notes, scriptures and things together for it, but God spoke to me saying "Youre not ready for it. How can you speak on it when you havent let go of things yourself"? I thought about that and said "Youre right".
Isnt it amazing how God can speak to you and it just turns on that light that you can clearly see?
I am reading a book called "So Long Insecurity" by Beth Moore. This book has hit home more than once and if you do not have it, GET IT! Its 18 chapters, but short ones and its AMAZING. If you have a problem with insecurities, GET IT!
One problem I have had in the past few months is that my fiance has an ex g/f from the past that wont leave (I think she finally has) him alone. She found him on FB, called, txt, msg on yahoo, FB, the whole 9 yards. You know, I dont have a problem in people talking to their ex's because I talk to mine. The problem I had in her is: she NEVER learned to leave the past in the past. She was the type to say : If things were this way, it would have turned out different; if we did this, it could have turned this way; we need to do this, do that; call me without your g/f knowing; lets meet somewhere alone; I mean it just was getting WAY out of hand with her! I drew the line with her. I told her if she couldnt talk to him with respect, then she didnt need to do it at all. Then my daughter finally got involved and then it started again. Well, sorry, you dont mess with family. My daughter was nice about it, she really was. But this other woman got an attitude back. SORRY, that dont work either. So, when the phone calls started back, txts again, I had to take drastic measures. I blocked her from his FB, yahoo, phone and I hope its all stopped. I have prayed about it, went to the altar and got prayers from quite a few people about it. It was nothing but the devil working in our lives. The devil doesnt want to see happiness.
2Corithians 12:11
I have made a fool of myself,but you drove me to it. I ought to have been commended by you, for I am not in the least inferior to the "super apostles" even though I am nothing.
But, its that I didnt trust him, it was her I didnt trust. With the 2 messages this week, I have done some changes this week. The speaker we had on Tuesday nite, she knows the changes I am working on. So, I just have to hang on, hang tight and persevere.
Hebrews 10:35-36
Do not throw away your confidence; it will be richly rewarded.You need to persevere so that when you have done the will of God, you will recieve what He has promised.
I have to keep doing those changes and the rewards WILL be great from God. All rewards are great no matter what! God is wonderful!
Its time to sign off and I will leave you with this scripture:
1 John 5:14-15
This is the confidence we have in approaching God: that if we ask anything according to His will, He hears us. And if we know that He hears us-whatever we ask-we know that we have what we asked of Him.
Until next time,
Rebecca of Sunnybrook Farm
About Me
- Rebecca of Sunnybrook Farm
- My name is Rebecca Schoolcraft. I moved to Florida in March of 2008.I have 3 children,(which pics will def be posted)and they are my world.Jennifer is my oldest and married. Joseph is engaged to be married and Priscilla is expecting my first grandchild in December. I got introduced to Gulf Coast Assembly of God in North Port, Florida; by the person I am currently dating; in September of 08. I LOVE THIS CHURCH. I love ALL members within this church. I got renewed with the Lord on Feb. 15, 2009, and got rebaptized on June 14,2009. It is the best feeling in the world to be able to live for Jesus, rebuking the devil, telling him he is a liar, and to just GO AWAY!!!!. I am involved with the leadership team in our womens ministry in church, volunteer with our food pantry once a month, and try to help out when I can. Oh, if you are wondering about the name,Pastor Keith at our church calls me that everyonce in awhile, so it stuck with me :-). I love his sense of humor. The pastor and his wife are AWESOME people, and without them, sometimes I feel like I would have fell apart long ago.
Thursday, June 24, 2010
Tuesday, December 15, 2009
The many blessings with miracles in my life this year
I just don't know where to start. I have so much to be thankful for this year. I know Thanksgiving is gone, but everyday I have something to be thankful for. So, the holidays aren't just occasions to say what we are thankful for or what blessings came our way. This is something that should be done everyday. Whether it's something someone did for us, what we did for someone else, what God did, a unexpected blessing that came our way, whatever it is, be gracious to give God the glory. Without Him, we would not have had those blessings and miracles.
Speaking of miracles. On November 23, 2009, my first grandchild was born. Allison Joyhannah Leigh Brown. Above is a picture of her a few hours after birth.(The one on the left) She was born a month early because she had hydrocephalus which means water on the brain. She had a couple of seizures and almost died twice after birth. A couple of days later, she developed jondis so the doctors put her under the lights. WELL....they kept her under there too long, and she got slightly burned. She developed a chest cold and did somewhat better after a few days. Then comes surgery when she was a week old. Doctors put a shunt in which went from her brain to her stomach. During this, she stopped breathing so she was put on a ventilator, went into a coma, then of course put back in the NEO NATAL unit in ICU. This was on a Monday. On the following Weds, the shunt did more work than what it should. It drained more fluid out than what it was producing causing her head to collapse. Boy she has been through so much. Now she is 3 weeks old and now the shunt (after yesterday, 12/14/09) is leaking. God will keep on healing this child. He has brought her this far and WILL continue to do so. (the pic on right is an updated pic of her)
Yesterday, my son was shot. I didn't know all the complete details but now he is ok and at home resting. The devil is just trying so hard to bring everyone down in my life that it is unreal. As soon as we give him that advantage and give up, then we are done. I don't know what caused the situation for my son to be shot, but to be honest, I really don't care. I do know he is fine and resting. That is all I care about. I'm glad he isn't laying on a gurney in a morgue in a funeral home or a hospital waiting on a family member to come there to identify his body. I love my kids regardless whether they live for the Lord or not. I have one that is and I am so grateful for that. (that's coming up in a few minutes) and 2 children that have strayed. I pray each and everyday that they all live for God and one day when this world is just a memory, we will all be together in Heaven rejoicing with the Lord and being one, big, happy family.
Jennifer, (which is my oldest) is a miracle child herself. She is 21 years of age and recently got married this year in April. When she was less than a year old she got real sick. She wasn't eating, mostly sleeping and I had no clue what was wrong. I took her to the local hospital and boy they were idiots. They sent her home with a big fever and said she had a head cold. Her dad and I was not satisfied with that. So, we took her to another hospital, they ran numerous tests on her and immediately put her in. They told us she had spinalmengidis. They also said if we were 2 hrs later, she would have died.She was in ICU for 10 days, hooked up to a heart monitor, wires, oxygen, you name it. I mean it looked bad. We did not leave that hospital until she did. The tests they did on her were like every hour on the hour, spinal taps, blood work, caths, I mean how many tests did they have to do? The doctors thought that she may have some brain damage or her sight be gone. Now, you can look at her and not tell she was even sick. She is my miracle child to this day. I love my beautiful daughter (inside joke) but yes she is beautiful. She has come a long way in the Lord. She and many others have prayed also for her husband to get into the church and find the truth. FINALLY it happened. On November 11, 2009 he got baptized in Jesus name and boy everyone was so happy...even her. Prayers were answered and it was taking alot of prayers, patience and dedication to make this happen. (pics will be posted)
My church family is somebody else I am thankful for. Gulf Coast Assembly of God in North Port, Florida is awesome. I know I have had some trials, made mistakes (of course no one is perfect) and going through some things right now, but they are ALWAYS there for me no matter whIat. Without them during some things, I would have gone crazy. I have become so involved in the church and I hope to continue to do so. I do it not for self gratification, I do it because its the work of God. I love Him and want to continue to do things for Him. He is what makes my days brighter, have more hope when I'm down and out, helps me put the devil in his place, and helps me bless other people when I'm able to do so.
So, after reading this, sit down when it's nice and quiet and list the things that you are truly thankful for. See also what you can do for someone else. If you know someone that is homebound, send a card or a phone call to brighten their day. Know someone that is in a resthome like a family member or friend? Go by and visit if you haven't in awhile. I'm sure they will enjoy the visit from you. You will be suprised just how much of a blessing this will bring to them.
God Bless You,
Rebecca of Sunnybrook Farm
Tuesday, November 10, 2009
Words that are NOT in Gods Vocabulary
We know that God works miracles everyday. Little do we know how big or little they may be till they happen. We pray everyday for healing, comfort, patience, love for one another, and even spiritual salvation. Our biggest prayer is for the lost. We want everyone to go to Heaven and be with our Father, walk the streets of gold, be with our family who went before us. But the ones who we have witnessed to have been so stuck in a "religion" for so long, they have their own beliefs. My now son-in-law is a prime example. He was raised up mostly Amish churches and ended up being Episcopilian (or however you spell it). My daughter is Pentecostal. Jennifer (oldest daughter) and I have been witnessing to him for the longest time about the Pentecostal beliefs. His exact words, "I will NEVER convert over" Well you know, NEVER is a word that is not in Gods' vocabulary. I am here to tell you now, that after a year in a half, he is getting baptized on November 11, 2009 in Jesus Name, at the Pentecostals of Sarasota Church. When Jennifer told me that, I was glad I was sitting down. Of course she asked me before she told me. He did take her to church all the time even though he didnt really like the beliefs of the church. But you know, PRAYER WORKS!!!! Faith works!!!!
It says in Matthew 17:20 So Jesus said to them, " Because of your unbelief; for assuredly, I say unto you, if you have faith as a mustard seed, you will say to this mountain, 'Move from here to there,' and it will move; and nothing will be impossible for you."
If you keep believing and have faith, nothing is impossible. That is another word that is NOT in His vocabulary; IMPOSSIBLE. God is the person who does the impossible. He is a miracle worker. He cleansed a leper, healed a paralytic, healed 2 blind men, fed the 5000, walked the sea, cast out an unclean spirit, need I go on?...Jesus is a TRUE miracle worker. He has healed people of cancer, tumors, healed people in wheelchairs to where they were able to walk again, etc. Doctors today are even baffled at what goes on. But some are brave enough to say that this is a work of God. They know God did these miracles. The others just wont say because either they dont believe or do not care. We know He did this. PRAISE GOD we live for a miracle worker and continues everyday to do so!!!!
Can't....Some people say they cant be saved....WHAT???? I tell you what. If He can save me after all I have been through, He can save anybody. First you have to admit you have fell short to the Glory of God.
Romans 3 22-23 "Even the righteousness of God, through faith in Jesus Christ, to all, and on all who believe. For there is no difference. For all have sinned and fall short of the glory of God.
Believe: Believe He died for the ungodly.....For the wages of sin is death, but the gift of God is eternal life in Christ Jesus our Lord.
Call out to the Lord for acceptance and forgiveness. Thats all you have to do is these 3 things.
Romans 10:13 "For whoever calls on the name of Jesus shall be saved"
I thank God for prayer warriors. If it was not for them, there would be no telling where my life would be right now. At this moment, Im also talking to my son-in-law and telling him this blog is about him, how proud I am of him. I reminded him of how he said he would never convert over. He replied " Yeah, just wasnt my time then". Not sure about that answer. Anyway, we know that things happen in Gods' time and not ours. We also have to learn how to have patience on things we want too. That Im sure will be in another blog soon.......
I will leave you with this scripture........so until then,
God Bless,
Rebecca of Sunnybrook Farm
2Timothy 1:9
God has saved us and called us with a holy calling, not according to our works, but according to His own purpose and grace which was given to us in Christ Jesus before time began.
It says in Matthew 17:20 So Jesus said to them, " Because of your unbelief; for assuredly, I say unto you, if you have faith as a mustard seed, you will say to this mountain, 'Move from here to there,' and it will move; and nothing will be impossible for you."
If you keep believing and have faith, nothing is impossible. That is another word that is NOT in His vocabulary; IMPOSSIBLE. God is the person who does the impossible. He is a miracle worker. He cleansed a leper, healed a paralytic, healed 2 blind men, fed the 5000, walked the sea, cast out an unclean spirit, need I go on?...Jesus is a TRUE miracle worker. He has healed people of cancer, tumors, healed people in wheelchairs to where they were able to walk again, etc. Doctors today are even baffled at what goes on. But some are brave enough to say that this is a work of God. They know God did these miracles. The others just wont say because either they dont believe or do not care. We know He did this. PRAISE GOD we live for a miracle worker and continues everyday to do so!!!!
Can't....Some people say they cant be saved....WHAT???? I tell you what. If He can save me after all I have been through, He can save anybody. First you have to admit you have fell short to the Glory of God.
Romans 3 22-23 "Even the righteousness of God, through faith in Jesus Christ, to all, and on all who believe. For there is no difference. For all have sinned and fall short of the glory of God.
Believe: Believe He died for the ungodly.....For the wages of sin is death, but the gift of God is eternal life in Christ Jesus our Lord.
Call out to the Lord for acceptance and forgiveness. Thats all you have to do is these 3 things.
Romans 10:13 "For whoever calls on the name of Jesus shall be saved"
I thank God for prayer warriors. If it was not for them, there would be no telling where my life would be right now. At this moment, Im also talking to my son-in-law and telling him this blog is about him, how proud I am of him. I reminded him of how he said he would never convert over. He replied " Yeah, just wasnt my time then". Not sure about that answer. Anyway, we know that things happen in Gods' time and not ours. We also have to learn how to have patience on things we want too. That Im sure will be in another blog soon.......
I will leave you with this scripture........so until then,
God Bless,
Rebecca of Sunnybrook Farm
2Timothy 1:9
God has saved us and called us with a holy calling, not according to our works, but according to His own purpose and grace which was given to us in Christ Jesus before time began.
Thursday, November 5, 2009
How You Can Overcome Your Past
I have spoken about my past marriages which were not all bad. My last one I have realized there are some things about it I have not completely let go of. I have forgiven him and everyone he has had an affair with except one person which I cannot get ahold of. But we all have put that part behind us now and have moved on. I thought after forgiving all parties that it would help me move on in my relationship with God and my relationship now with the person I am dating. Something was holding me back and I just could not put my finger on it until a few days ago. Lastnite I was at church and our Pastors wife did the sermon. This was the first time I actually heard her preach also. She was AWESOME!!!! This was a message I REALLY needed to hear, pertaining to my past and how to let it go. Boy, God works in mysterious ways doesnt He? Just when you think He is on the sideline doing His own thing, or just sitting back watching you, He is still working, planning, and controlling you as usual.
Anyway, we dont have to forget our past like the good things. As she said, like traditions. Such as during holidays. As say, if your grandparents weren't there during the holidays. You wanted to make a certain dish to have that memory of that person being there. You would want that memory being there. The bad memories you would not want in your life such as abuse, harsh words, alcohol, drugs, etc. But God will make a way for those memories to go away.
God gives us strength for each day. We are overcomers. It says in Psalm 31:14 "But as for me, I trust in You, O Lord; I say, "You are my God." We do have to trust in Him. If we don't put our trust in Him, then who else would we trust? We can't trust man. There is no telling where we would be or how we would end up.
Romans 8: 28 "And we know that all things work together for good to those who love God, to those who are the called according to His purpose." If we are called to God, and do his purpose, listen, then He will do as planned. But we have to trust Him and put your hope in Him.
You are probably wondering how you prepare to do all this? Well, I will tell you. ( By the way, when Im at church, Im a notetaker so yeah I take ALOT of notes so when I want to go back and reference something, I have it :-)
1. Going deeper into the things of God.
2. Maintain a strong relationship with God.
3. Reading His word, consistent prayer life.
4. Applying and speaking Gods word into our lives and over situations.
5. God wants people that desire more of Him and less of themselves.
We have to press forward towards the prize of what God has for us. DONT GIVE UP!!!! DONT LET THE DEVIL WIN!!!! Dont give into gossip, slander, pride, or anything negative. Worship Him into spirit and into truth.
I will close with this scripture and hope you have a blessed day!!
Matthew 16:18 "And I also say to you that you are Peter, and on this rock I will build My church, and the gates of Hades shall not prevail against it."
God Bless,
Rebecca of Sunnybrook Farm
Anyway, we dont have to forget our past like the good things. As she said, like traditions. Such as during holidays. As say, if your grandparents weren't there during the holidays. You wanted to make a certain dish to have that memory of that person being there. You would want that memory being there. The bad memories you would not want in your life such as abuse, harsh words, alcohol, drugs, etc. But God will make a way for those memories to go away.
God gives us strength for each day. We are overcomers. It says in Psalm 31:14 "But as for me, I trust in You, O Lord; I say, "You are my God." We do have to trust in Him. If we don't put our trust in Him, then who else would we trust? We can't trust man. There is no telling where we would be or how we would end up.
Romans 8: 28 "And we know that all things work together for good to those who love God, to those who are the called according to His purpose." If we are called to God, and do his purpose, listen, then He will do as planned. But we have to trust Him and put your hope in Him.
You are probably wondering how you prepare to do all this? Well, I will tell you. ( By the way, when Im at church, Im a notetaker so yeah I take ALOT of notes so when I want to go back and reference something, I have it :-)
1. Going deeper into the things of God.
2. Maintain a strong relationship with God.
3. Reading His word, consistent prayer life.
4. Applying and speaking Gods word into our lives and over situations.
5. God wants people that desire more of Him and less of themselves.
We have to press forward towards the prize of what God has for us. DONT GIVE UP!!!! DONT LET THE DEVIL WIN!!!! Dont give into gossip, slander, pride, or anything negative. Worship Him into spirit and into truth.
I will close with this scripture and hope you have a blessed day!!
Matthew 16:18 "And I also say to you that you are Peter, and on this rock I will build My church, and the gates of Hades shall not prevail against it."
God Bless,
Rebecca of Sunnybrook Farm
Saturday, October 24, 2009
Going by Faith and Not Sight
You know, we all have faith. Sometimes we wonder also how strong our faith is. For 2 days this week, the devil has been trying to bring me down to where I forget about God. IM SORRY, THATS NOT HAPPENING. One morning I woke up feeling not very well. I thought maybe I was starting to get this Swine Flu bug. Reason being is because the night before, I am going to WalMart to buy longjohns. Yes, I live in Florida and Im needing longjohns. I WAS FREEZING!!!! Tossing and turning, freezing and sweating, so yeah, Swine Flu or something bad was going through my mind. Thank God that wasnt it. So, the day continues, still feeling bad throughout the night. The next day is when my day gets REALLY BAD!!!! First I have a doctors appointment, which wasnt so bad. I am on the way home, and my car decides to breakdown on me. So here I am, in WalMart parking lot (Yes I LOVE shopping at WalMart), in the middle of it, car not movable, and IM STUCK AND I MEAN STUCK. Luckily someone was at home to pick me up because I sure didnt feel like walking 10 miles to go home. When I finally get home, I talk to my youngest daughter, who is due December 11, about her pregnancy. This is where my faith really comes in. She tells me about her doctors appointment the day before. The baby has fluid on her brain, and nothing the doctors can do till birth. So its like, WOW. God, how much more can I take today?
We know Gods' Promise. He will not put on us no more than we can handle. Yes sometimes we struggle, have problems, financial struggle, and even struggle in the church. But you know, God is with us always. Even when we don't realize it.
Joshua 1:9 says "Have I not commanded you? Be strong and of good courage; do not be afraid, nor be dismayed, for the Lord your God is with you wherever you go".
Even in Matthew 11:28-30 it says " Come to Me, all you who labor and are heavy laden, and I will give you rest. Take My yoke upon you and learn from Me, for I am gentle and lowly in heart, and you will find rest in your souls. For my yoke is easy and My burden is light".
Yes, He is with us. He carries our burdens when we cant. Sometimes when we feel so down, out and low, He is still there no matter what. There is a song that I run through my head when I am like that. "I Will Praise You In This Storm" by Casting Crowns. I play it over and over and over. No matter what, DO NOT LET THE DEVIL WIN. I talked to my oldest daughter, Jennifer and Cindy from church and those 2 helped me out alot those 2 days. Jennifer told me all it was, the devil was just trying to get my mind focused off of God. Which later on I thought about it, and yeah she was right. I had so many thoughts go through my mind about going getting a drink to make me feel better, so yeah, it was the devil. THANK GOD I NEVER TOOK THAT FIRST DRINK. I stomped that devil through the ground, cast him out of my mind, and after that, my days (so far) have been great. God is my refuge, strength, hope, MY EVERYTHING.
Ok, so I will leave you with this scripture and I will sign off for the day.
God Bless,
Rebecca of Sunnybrook Farm
Romans 6:4
"Therefore we were buried with Him through baptism into death, that just as Christ was raised from the dead by the glory of the Father, even so we also should walk in newness of life."
We know Gods' Promise. He will not put on us no more than we can handle. Yes sometimes we struggle, have problems, financial struggle, and even struggle in the church. But you know, God is with us always. Even when we don't realize it.
Joshua 1:9 says "Have I not commanded you? Be strong and of good courage; do not be afraid, nor be dismayed, for the Lord your God is with you wherever you go".
Even in Matthew 11:28-30 it says " Come to Me, all you who labor and are heavy laden, and I will give you rest. Take My yoke upon you and learn from Me, for I am gentle and lowly in heart, and you will find rest in your souls. For my yoke is easy and My burden is light".
Yes, He is with us. He carries our burdens when we cant. Sometimes when we feel so down, out and low, He is still there no matter what. There is a song that I run through my head when I am like that. "I Will Praise You In This Storm" by Casting Crowns. I play it over and over and over. No matter what, DO NOT LET THE DEVIL WIN. I talked to my oldest daughter, Jennifer and Cindy from church and those 2 helped me out alot those 2 days. Jennifer told me all it was, the devil was just trying to get my mind focused off of God. Which later on I thought about it, and yeah she was right. I had so many thoughts go through my mind about going getting a drink to make me feel better, so yeah, it was the devil. THANK GOD I NEVER TOOK THAT FIRST DRINK. I stomped that devil through the ground, cast him out of my mind, and after that, my days (so far) have been great. God is my refuge, strength, hope, MY EVERYTHING.
Ok, so I will leave you with this scripture and I will sign off for the day.
God Bless,
Rebecca of Sunnybrook Farm
Romans 6:4
"Therefore we were buried with Him through baptism into death, that just as Christ was raised from the dead by the glory of the Father, even so we also should walk in newness of life."
Tuesday, October 20, 2009
How a Person Can Change Your Life Completely
You know, you meet someone, date them, fall in love, get engaged, get married, and you think youre goin to live happily ever after.....NOT!!!! I have been there, done that. Not once, but TWICE. I have been married twice, abusive relationship, (both mental, physical, emotional). You know, you think you can put up with it, struggle through it, and change the other person. BUT only that person can change and be willing to do so.
The first time I was married was for 4 years. This was the man I had my children with. I think that was the only good thing that came out of that marriage. I married him while I was still in high school. I just turned 17 years of age 3 months prior. So yeah, I was still young. Anyway, if I had only listened to my dad, I would not of got married in the first place. But we think we know it all, we dont think our parents know what they are talking about, BUT as we get older, we realize, WE were wrong. Well, we got into a Pentecostal church in 1988 and it was the weirdest thing I had ever saw. What in the world are these people doing shouting, running around like chickens with their heads cut off, and talking in such language? Its like, Im getting out of here.. THESE PEOPLE ARE NUTS!!!! Being such a humble (or trying to be) wife to my husband, he wanted us to go back. His sister, her husband, and a few other people from that church wanted us to come back. So, we did.We kept going back, and back, and back. Then we had revival. Boy, that was an experience. That opened up my eyes to a new level. At this time I was also pregnant with my first child. To make a LONG story short, I ended up getting into the church, BUT (this is the kicker) I did it for my husband and not for myself. I got tired of him pressuring me into the church, "preaching" to me on things, I mean over and over and over. So I figured if I got into church like everyone else, he would stop. NOT. I wasnt getting over it that easy. Dont get me wrong, I did enjoy getting into the church because I ended up jumping, shouting and speaking in a different toungue just as they did. But I did it more for him than myself. I just didnt feel completely happy as I thought I would. One week we had revival and on a moon on Monday nite, I went into labor, and onto the hospital I go....Jennifer Lynn Brown was born. Then August of next year, Joseph Karel, then Oct of 1990, Priscilla Gabrielle...Yeah, I just couldnt figure out what birth control was...LOL..In that same year, my husband and I were already seperated on our way to divorce. The abuse I just couldnt take anymore. (There is alot more to this that I just have to end up writing a book on both husbands....any suggestions on publishers????) So, now off to husband #2.
This one was a little different...........well.........ok......ALOT........This marriage lasted almost 14 years...How in the world I stayed with this man, this long, I HAVE NO IDEA. ONLY GOD HAD ME MAKE IT THAT FAR!!!! I met him, and I thought things were going to be different, which they were....at least for awhile anyway. Then things flipped. It was like flipping a pancake in a pan. Totally different on the other side. Things were really abusive both physical, and mental. I figured if I could just put up with it, and do nice things for him he would have a change of heart. NOT!!!!. Im not saying the whole marriage was a total disaster because it wasnt. We had our good times. He was great some of the time. We had our anniversary, birthday, or just because dinners. I just had something missing. That thing that was missing was called God. Yes I prayed, I TRIED to go to church but he said what was the use. He wasnt going to do anything for us. I knew better. I knew if I couldnt go to church that I could pray anyway. I wanted God to do something, so He did. I was in such a rut in my life, (and it wasnt just my husband) that He told me to get help. The help I needed was to get away from my drug addiction. I was on probation at the time, so I turned myself in to have my time activated. I stayed away for almost 2 years. I didnt even let my husband know what I was going to do because I didnt think he even cared. Seemed he didnt care during our marriage, so why would he now? When I returned after 2 years, things were somewhat different. Then 5 years later, we divorced. That day turned into reality. It was like, youre kidding. Were divorced???? Were no longer married? I went into a depression mode for 6 weeks. I was so used to having him around for almost 14 years that now he wasnt going to be around anymore. Yes I loved him, but WOW. hes gone. Later on I found out he was cheating on me with 3 other women during our last summer together and BOY THAT HURT DEEPLY. That was something I NEVER EVER expected out of him. Now, we get along better divorced than married.
Florida............I now live in Florida. I did not want to come here to start with. A friend of mine wanted me to move here. I said your NUTS. I dont want to leave North Carolina. I have a job, family and what is there in Florida that I dont have here?...He said a new life. Somewhere that noboby knows you, your past or anything. You can start over, and please move. I thought about it and said NO, Im not going anywhere. I talked to my mom, and she said, "Go. You need it. Get away from all this drama here. Put your past behind you. I will miss you, but you will be fine." So, my decision was made. I moved. I hated it for the first couple of months mainly because of the weather...MAN ITS HOT DOWN HERE!!!! I moved here March of 2008. In August of the same year, I met (this is where my title comes in at) Tom. We met online on a singlesite. I tried meeting a few people there but just didnt work out. One guy was a complete DISASTER. (WE WONT GO THERE).Tom was different. Our first date was Ruby Tuesday,walk through the mall, playing pool and a walk on Siesta Key Beach. Man that was awesome. After that night, we didnt think we would ever see each other again. Main reason is because he is 5'2 and I'm 5'9....I weigh over 200 and he is like a little over 110....Yeah big difference there. We talked online the next night for over 5 hrs and have been going strong ever since. He is the one who introduced me to Gulf Coast Assembly of God in North Port. This man is so unbelievable. In the 14 months we have been together, there has hardly been no harsh words between us, spoiling on both sides, doing things just because, and its like, how in the world did I deserve such kindness like this? I have to pinch myself because of it. He still calls me at least 3 times a day, if not more, just to say "hello" ,"I love you", or "Im just thinking of you". He blows my mind sometimes. I know Im bragging, but you just dont realize the things I have been through in my life and this coming along is like, I have just won the lottery. I thank God everyday for this man. I take one day at a time with him and let each day soak in.
GOD.....He has also changed my life. When I got rebaptized, that was life changing also. Man, this past year has been so AWESOME. Sometimes I just sit by my window, looking at the trees blowing and just looking at His beauty that He created. That man is just unbelievable. This man died on a cross, went through so much pain for us. And just to think, if some people sit back and think about this...I mean really think what He went through for us, they themselves may have a different outlook on life. But we cannot change them, they have to change themselves. All we can do is pray daily for them. Prayer does work, TRUST ME. The things I have been through, I wouldnt be here today if it wasnt for prayer.
Ok, enough for today. Will be posting again soon. Hope this has helped someone. Please leave comments if you wish.
Take care,
God Bless,
Rebecca of Sunnybrook Farm :-)
The first time I was married was for 4 years. This was the man I had my children with. I think that was the only good thing that came out of that marriage. I married him while I was still in high school. I just turned 17 years of age 3 months prior. So yeah, I was still young. Anyway, if I had only listened to my dad, I would not of got married in the first place. But we think we know it all, we dont think our parents know what they are talking about, BUT as we get older, we realize, WE were wrong. Well, we got into a Pentecostal church in 1988 and it was the weirdest thing I had ever saw. What in the world are these people doing shouting, running around like chickens with their heads cut off, and talking in such language? Its like, Im getting out of here.. THESE PEOPLE ARE NUTS!!!! Being such a humble (or trying to be) wife to my husband, he wanted us to go back. His sister, her husband, and a few other people from that church wanted us to come back. So, we did.We kept going back, and back, and back. Then we had revival. Boy, that was an experience. That opened up my eyes to a new level. At this time I was also pregnant with my first child. To make a LONG story short, I ended up getting into the church, BUT (this is the kicker) I did it for my husband and not for myself. I got tired of him pressuring me into the church, "preaching" to me on things, I mean over and over and over. So I figured if I got into church like everyone else, he would stop. NOT. I wasnt getting over it that easy. Dont get me wrong, I did enjoy getting into the church because I ended up jumping, shouting and speaking in a different toungue just as they did. But I did it more for him than myself. I just didnt feel completely happy as I thought I would. One week we had revival and on a moon on Monday nite, I went into labor, and onto the hospital I go....Jennifer Lynn Brown was born. Then August of next year, Joseph Karel, then Oct of 1990, Priscilla Gabrielle...Yeah, I just couldnt figure out what birth control was...LOL..In that same year, my husband and I were already seperated on our way to divorce. The abuse I just couldnt take anymore. (There is alot more to this that I just have to end up writing a book on both husbands....any suggestions on publishers????) So, now off to husband #2.
This one was a little different...........well.........ok......ALOT........This marriage lasted almost 14 years...How in the world I stayed with this man, this long, I HAVE NO IDEA. ONLY GOD HAD ME MAKE IT THAT FAR!!!! I met him, and I thought things were going to be different, which they were....at least for awhile anyway. Then things flipped. It was like flipping a pancake in a pan. Totally different on the other side. Things were really abusive both physical, and mental. I figured if I could just put up with it, and do nice things for him he would have a change of heart. NOT!!!!. Im not saying the whole marriage was a total disaster because it wasnt. We had our good times. He was great some of the time. We had our anniversary, birthday, or just because dinners. I just had something missing. That thing that was missing was called God. Yes I prayed, I TRIED to go to church but he said what was the use. He wasnt going to do anything for us. I knew better. I knew if I couldnt go to church that I could pray anyway. I wanted God to do something, so He did. I was in such a rut in my life, (and it wasnt just my husband) that He told me to get help. The help I needed was to get away from my drug addiction. I was on probation at the time, so I turned myself in to have my time activated. I stayed away for almost 2 years. I didnt even let my husband know what I was going to do because I didnt think he even cared. Seemed he didnt care during our marriage, so why would he now? When I returned after 2 years, things were somewhat different. Then 5 years later, we divorced. That day turned into reality. It was like, youre kidding. Were divorced???? Were no longer married? I went into a depression mode for 6 weeks. I was so used to having him around for almost 14 years that now he wasnt going to be around anymore. Yes I loved him, but WOW. hes gone. Later on I found out he was cheating on me with 3 other women during our last summer together and BOY THAT HURT DEEPLY. That was something I NEVER EVER expected out of him. Now, we get along better divorced than married.
Florida............I now live in Florida. I did not want to come here to start with. A friend of mine wanted me to move here. I said your NUTS. I dont want to leave North Carolina. I have a job, family and what is there in Florida that I dont have here?...He said a new life. Somewhere that noboby knows you, your past or anything. You can start over, and please move. I thought about it and said NO, Im not going anywhere. I talked to my mom, and she said, "Go. You need it. Get away from all this drama here. Put your past behind you. I will miss you, but you will be fine." So, my decision was made. I moved. I hated it for the first couple of months mainly because of the weather...MAN ITS HOT DOWN HERE!!!! I moved here March of 2008. In August of the same year, I met (this is where my title comes in at) Tom. We met online on a singlesite. I tried meeting a few people there but just didnt work out. One guy was a complete DISASTER. (WE WONT GO THERE).Tom was different. Our first date was Ruby Tuesday,walk through the mall, playing pool and a walk on Siesta Key Beach. Man that was awesome. After that night, we didnt think we would ever see each other again. Main reason is because he is 5'2 and I'm 5'9....I weigh over 200 and he is like a little over 110....Yeah big difference there. We talked online the next night for over 5 hrs and have been going strong ever since. He is the one who introduced me to Gulf Coast Assembly of God in North Port. This man is so unbelievable. In the 14 months we have been together, there has hardly been no harsh words between us, spoiling on both sides, doing things just because, and its like, how in the world did I deserve such kindness like this? I have to pinch myself because of it. He still calls me at least 3 times a day, if not more, just to say "hello" ,"I love you", or "Im just thinking of you". He blows my mind sometimes. I know Im bragging, but you just dont realize the things I have been through in my life and this coming along is like, I have just won the lottery. I thank God everyday for this man. I take one day at a time with him and let each day soak in.
GOD.....He has also changed my life. When I got rebaptized, that was life changing also. Man, this past year has been so AWESOME. Sometimes I just sit by my window, looking at the trees blowing and just looking at His beauty that He created. That man is just unbelievable. This man died on a cross, went through so much pain for us. And just to think, if some people sit back and think about this...I mean really think what He went through for us, they themselves may have a different outlook on life. But we cannot change them, they have to change themselves. All we can do is pray daily for them. Prayer does work, TRUST ME. The things I have been through, I wouldnt be here today if it wasnt for prayer.
Ok, enough for today. Will be posting again soon. Hope this has helped someone. Please leave comments if you wish.
Take care,
God Bless,
Rebecca of Sunnybrook Farm :-)
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