How a Person Can Change Your Life Completely

You know, you meet someone, date them, fall in love, get engaged, get married, and you think youre goin to live happily ever after.....NOT!!!! I have been there, done that. Not once, but TWICE. I have been married twice, abusive relationship, (both mental, physical, emotional). You know, you think you can put up with it, struggle through it, and change the other person. BUT only that person can change and be willing to do so.
The first time I was married was for 4 years. This was the man I had my children with. I think that was the only good thing that came out of that marriage. I married him while I was still in high school. I just turned 17 years of age 3 months prior. So yeah, I was still young. Anyway, if I had only listened to my dad, I would not of got married in the first place. But we think we know it all, we dont think our parents know what they are talking about, BUT as we get older, we realize, WE were wrong. Well, we got into a Pentecostal church in 1988 and it was the weirdest thing I had ever saw. What in the world are these people doing shouting, running around like chickens with their heads cut off, and talking in such language? Its like, Im getting out of here.. THESE PEOPLE ARE NUTS!!!! Being such a humble (or trying to be) wife to my husband, he wanted us to go back. His sister, her husband, and a few other people from that church wanted us to come back. So, we did.We kept going back, and back, and back. Then we had revival. Boy, that was an experience. That opened up my eyes to a new level. At this time I was also pregnant with my first child. To make a LONG story short, I ended up getting into the church, BUT (this is the kicker) I did it for my husband and not for myself. I got tired of him pressuring me into the church, "preaching" to me on things, I mean over and over and over. So I figured if I got into church like everyone else, he would stop. NOT. I wasnt getting over it that easy. Dont get me wrong, I did enjoy getting into the church because I ended up jumping, shouting and speaking in a different toungue just as they did. But I did it more for him than myself. I just didnt feel completely happy as I thought I would. One week we had revival and on a moon on Monday nite, I went into labor, and onto the hospital I go....Jennifer Lynn Brown was born. Then August of next year, Joseph Karel, then Oct of 1990, Priscilla Gabrielle...Yeah, I just couldnt figure out what birth control was...LOL..In that same year, my husband and I were already seperated on our way to divorce. The abuse I just couldnt take anymore. (There is alot more to this that I just have to end up writing a book on both husbands....any suggestions on publishers????) So, now off to husband #2.
This one was a little different...........well.........ok......ALOT........This marriage lasted almost 14 years...How in the world I stayed with this man, this long, I HAVE NO IDEA. ONLY GOD HAD ME MAKE IT THAT FAR!!!! I met him, and I thought things were going to be different, which they were....at least for awhile anyway. Then things flipped. It was like flipping a pancake in a pan. Totally different on the other side. Things were really abusive both physical, and mental. I figured if I could just put up with it, and do nice things for him he would have a change of heart. NOT!!!!. Im not saying the whole marriage was a total disaster because it wasnt. We had our good times. He was great some of the time. We had our anniversary, birthday, or just because dinners. I just had something missing. That thing that was missing was called God. Yes I prayed, I TRIED to go to church but he said what was the use. He wasnt going to do anything for us. I knew better. I knew if I couldnt go to church that I could pray anyway. I wanted God to do something, so He did. I was in such a rut in my life, (and it wasnt just my husband) that He told me to get help. The help I needed was to get away from my drug addiction. I was on probation at the time, so I turned myself in to have my time activated. I stayed away for almost 2 years. I didnt even let my husband know what I was going to do because I didnt think he even cared. Seemed he didnt care during our marriage, so why would he now? When I returned after 2 years, things were somewhat different. Then 5 years later, we divorced. That day turned into reality. It was like, youre kidding. Were divorced???? Were no longer married? I went into a depression mode for 6 weeks. I was so used to having him around for almost 14 years that now he wasnt going to be around anymore. Yes I loved him, but WOW. hes gone. Later on I found out he was cheating on me with 3 other women during our last summer together and BOY THAT HURT DEEPLY. That was something I NEVER EVER expected out of him. Now, we get along better divorced than married.
Florida............I now live in Florida. I did not want to come here to start with. A friend of mine wanted me to move here. I said your NUTS. I dont want to leave North Carolina. I have a job, family and what is there in Florida that I dont have here?...He said a new life. Somewhere that noboby knows you, your past or anything. You can start over, and please move. I thought about it and said NO, Im not going anywhere. I talked to my mom, and she said, "Go. You need it. Get away from all this drama here. Put your past behind you. I will miss you, but you will be fine." So, my decision was made. I moved. I hated it for the first couple of months mainly because of the weather...MAN ITS HOT DOWN HERE!!!! I moved here March of 2008. In August of the same year, I met (this is where my title comes in at) Tom. We met online on a singlesite. I tried meeting a few people there but just didnt work out. One guy was a complete DISASTER. (WE WONT GO THERE).Tom was different. Our first date was Ruby Tuesday,walk through the mall, playing pool and a walk on Siesta Key Beach. Man that was awesome. After that night, we didnt think we would ever see each other again. Main reason is because he is 5'2 and I'm 5'9....I weigh over 200 and he is like a little over 110....Yeah big difference there. We talked online the next night for over 5 hrs and have been going strong ever since. He is the one who introduced me to Gulf Coast Assembly of God in North Port. This man is so unbelievable. In the 14 months we have been together, there has hardly been no harsh words between us, spoiling on both sides, doing things just because, and its like, how in the world did I deserve such kindness like this? I have to pinch myself because of it. He still calls me at least 3 times a day, if not more, just to say "hello" ,"I love you", or "Im just thinking of you". He blows my mind sometimes. I know Im bragging, but you just dont realize the things I have been through in my life and this coming along is like, I have just won the lottery. I thank God everyday for this man. I take one day at a time with him and let each day soak in.
GOD.....He has also changed my life. When I got rebaptized, that was life changing also. Man, this past year has been so AWESOME. Sometimes I just sit by my window, looking at the trees blowing and just looking at His beauty that He created. That man is just unbelievable. This man died on a cross, went through so much pain for us. And just to think, if some people sit back and think about this...I mean really think what He went through for us, they themselves may have a different outlook on life. But we cannot change them, they have to change themselves. All we can do is pray daily for them. Prayer does work, TRUST ME. The things I have been through, I wouldnt be here today if it wasnt for prayer.
Ok, enough for today. Will be posting again soon. Hope this has helped someone. Please leave comments if you wish.

Take care,
God Bless,
Rebecca of Sunnybrook Farm :-)